"How to Survive a Scottish Winter Which May Last a Few Days"

Sometimes just sometimes a wee post pops up on the Scotsman forum that has me spraying coffee over the VDU. The post below is to me just so topical and on message right now as we witness the bleating and baying whipped up by the BBC and the MSM about the weather. If I see one more f/wit reporting from Altnaharra on the BBC, I will surely break the screen.

And then we had the minister for snow on yesterday who seems to wink at you as he talks, teling us that our weather is different from the continetals as they know when they will get winter! Dear Jesus save me from these Winking Humphreys, who apparently know things that we don't.

A snow flake is spotted drifting past the window of the BBCs DGs office in London, and the klaxons go of as the boak machine cranks up the anti and sends Greedy Fat Bastards flying into the supermarkets stuffing their trollys with pizzas and TV dinners, then they q up to fill their 4x4s which have run on 1/4 tanks all year up to the brim with fuel. So now we have Mr and Mrs Greedy Fat Bastard lugging around 75% more fuel than they need so putting pressure on the supply chain just when Mr and Mrs Greedy Fat Bastard finds themselves slithering all over the road as they are to selfish to drive with due care and attention. The owning of a 4x4 seems to give these Greedy fat Bastards legitimacy to drive as if only they are on the roads.

RANT OVER I AM OF TO MORRISONS IN MY LANDY TO FILL UP.

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From the Scotsman forum:

Mac the Naif,

03/12/2010 01:04:42

"And none the doubt if this cold snap goes on, we will all die of starvation, and a lack of fuel"

Just remember Charles, eat the thin ones first, keep the plump ones for last.

And if you do run out of fuel - just think of the human body as meaty sushi.

(those tips were taken from my new book "How to Survive a Scottish Winter Which May Last a Few Days)